Wow... It's been a while...

Sometimes I feel really strong. I feel like I can go through life and take whatever it throws at me. And sometimes, I feel like just sleeping. I'm at the "I just want to sleep" stage right now.

I guess this post will just be about what I'm tired of right now.

I'm tired of seeing idiot people hurting each other.

I'm tired of seeing the world go to pieces because people think of only themselves.

I'm tired of feeling like I'm not enough. To anyone.

I'm tired of fighting my attractions in a world where love is celebrated/mentioned in almost every form, whether it's in books, music, tv, etc.

I'm tired of liking someone and them not liking me back.

I'm just tired.

I know this post was rather depressing, and it probably sounds like I'm complaining (which I am), but... I'm just tired.

I can't help but feel just a little resentful towards the prospect of either being alone and in my church or being with someone and being out of my church. Why can't I have both?? I love my church. But I'd be lying if I said that I was strong with this.

I'm tired.

Kelsey

For My Grammy and Grampy

So the following poem isn't the most polished poem I've written, but it's done. I'm not adding or removing anything from it, as it's very personal to me. I know it's rough in some places, but at the moment those were the only words I could use to capture the emotions I was feeling. It's simple, hard, rough and how I felt.

To Grandpa and Grandma, I love you both!!

17, so young and sweet, life still has so much in store, but for now he's content as he's never been before...

25 and he's still in love with the one who's stolen his heart, he's been thanking God at every day's start...

31 and he's been around the block a few times with the missus (and children), he's been working hard to care for all of them...

43, his body is catching up to him as it's starting to ache, but even with pains growing, his spirit will never break...

65 and more years to come, he's still in love with his only one...

There's a candle that's been burning for them both, they're still in love but one was called home...

87 and his love has just left and he's lost without being found. She's a beautiful lady who's still with us all...

But who can blame him for being so empty..?
He's still in love, and I'm glad to know that when it's time, she's the first one he'll see...

Kelsey :)